For anyone who's experienced parental alienation or knows someone who has; it's very clear that it's a severe form of abuse that needs severe punishment.
For some it still seems hard for them to comprehend that if you remove a child from a loving parent and then actively make efforts top destroy a parent/child relationship, it can have disastrous consequences.
Bizarrely it's still disputed that parental alienation is even a "thing" by some radical feminist groups. Groups that seem unable to realise that their anti-PA campaigns are causing a knock-on effect, which is a rise in the number of mothers who are alienated from their children.
At first it seems appropriate to ignore them as they're insignificant in number and credibility however any opposition can create doubt and this doubt is causing parental alienation to continue to impact millions of parents and children worldwide without any significant effort to punish or even deter the perpetrators of this callous abuse.
When I say millions, this is not an exaggeration. PAPA has thousands of members worldwide and we are barely even scratching the surface.
So prolific is this type of abuse; that until fairly recently it was considered the "norm" for a parent to effectively be erased from their child's life or at best settle for the role of "second parent".
Thankfully PAPA, along with other similar groups have managed to mostly erase those perceptions of parenting roles and it's now widely recognised that both parents being equally involved is the best outcome for children who's parents have separated.
While we've been able to have a positive impact regarding equal parenting, it's still very clear that parental alienation is not being taken as seriously as it should be.
If you saw a parent hitting their child or putting out a cigarette on them or screaming obscenities at them you'd be appalled, right? It's likely you may try to intervene or even report them for this abuse, so why is parental alienation ignored?
Parental alienation is arguably much much worse than the above and has even been compared to sexual abuse by some psychologists, in terms of the severe impact it can have on a child's emotional and mental welfare from childhood and throughout adulthood.
It's important that we continue to make sure that parental alienation is accepted as a widespread and covert abuse tactic that is harming millions of families worldwide.
Only when parental alienation is universally accepted can we secure better outcomes for families and children and only then can we ensure the perpetrators of this abhorrent abuse are rightfully punished.
Why is Parental Alienation child abuse?
Abuse is generally defined by a person intentionally causing harm and/or distress to another person, so I'm sure you'll agree that by definition; parental alienation is indeed abuse.
We know this due to the severe and often long-lasting harm and distress caused to children both emotionally and psychologically. Please read our article: The long-term impact on alienated children for further information.
Parental alienation is primarily used as a tactic to exert power and/or control over the other parent however the target parent is not the only victim, the children involved are also victims and are always affected, with some cases being so severe they result in death.
The often insidious tactics of PA can have incredibly severe consequences. At first it may only impact the target parent but over time this extends to the children.
Often children will be exposed to the alienator "badmouthing" the target parent or even being made to feel guilty for wanting to spend time with the target parent. A child's natural reaction to this is to try and appease the alienating parent in order to avoid any negative consequences.
I have seen children punished severely just for asking to see their other parent. I have seen alienating parents destroy and dispose of gifts, mementos, photographs and letters given to the children by their target parent, in order to make them believe that their other parent is not important or does not love them.
I have even seen alienating parents directly tell their children that their other parent does not care about them and has another family, meanwhile they are fighting tirelessly to see their children.
It's truly disgusting the lengths alienating parents will go to to try erase the other parent.
Continued exposure to alienating behaviours like this can cause depression in children as well as unhealthy attachments to the alienating parent, such as trauma bonding.
It's often observed that alienated children can exhibit multiple negative symptoms all at the same time including (but not limited to): anxiety, depression, anger issues, fear, lack of focus and low self esteem.
This of course can have a detrimental impact on a child's ability to perform at school and/or in social situations which can have lasting implications.
Even if the child somehow manages to go through childhood unaware they've been alienated, once they become adults and inevitably find out the truth, the trauma could be too much to even fathom.
To find out you've missed out on a childhood of memories with the other side of your family, who love you and have been longing for a relationship with you, only to have been thwarted by your other parent. A parent who you grew up trusting but turned out to be evil and calculated.
Imagine finding that out - and they will. Alienated children will not always be children so if you're an alienating parent reading this, it's not too late to reverse the damage you've caused. Otherwise the time will come when your child knows the truth.
Parental alienation is an intentional act, an act with the intention of hurting the other parent but which also harms the children involved. This is why it is clearly abuse and clearly child abuse as a result.
We need to continue to fight to safeguard our children from this abuse, for the betterment of our society.
In need of help?
If you are an alienated parent reading this article and feel you are in need of help and support then please make sure to join PAPA today by signing up here on our website, completely free.
This will give you access to our community support forum as well as our upcoming Resource Centre, which will include free downloadable guides to help through the process of being alienated and regaining contact with your children.
We also have a free to use Facebook support group that you can join here.
If you are a member of PAPA you can also send us a message here on the website and we will try to get back to you as soon as possible but please bear in mind, we have hundreds of messages weekly so it may take us a while to get back to you.
Thank you for reading and for your continued support of PAPA and our mission to end parental alienation.
great effort thanks.